So, I'm in the grocery store, aimlessly wandering about the health food isle, when I see some slut I went to school with. I make some comment about feeling lost in the grocery store, and she snaps back with "oh, what sign are you" like finding out what sign I am will decide what kind of garbanzo beans I want. I say capricorn, even though I think astrology is shit. She makes this god awful annoying face, and says "yeah figures" Fuck you figures, god I hate that. Listen you stupid ass , What sign I am has about as much to do with my personality as the midget stocking the hotpockets. Here is a clue, and take this one to the bank. Astrology IS MADE UP.
THE DEFINITION OF ASTROLOGY: Something some fucking fat loafy hippy bitch made up to annoy the shit out of everyone with an i.q. over 50.
How can you think stars and numbers have anything to do with the way your life turns out? Nothing annoys me more than when someone tells you what your future is, just because some distant planet is dry humping another distant planet while some star is dying. Are you kidding me? how can you be so naive?
THINGS THAT DO NOT AFFECT YOUR LIFE:
1. Astrology
THINGS THAT DO AFFECT YOUR LIFE
1. Killing someone
2. Someone killing you
3. fucking someones wife/husband
4. someones wife/husband fucking you
5. Being Molested by your uncle tom
6. watching your little brother burn alive
8. someone force feeding you, your own shit.
9. having sex with a homeless person.
10. driving off a cliff.
If one more person comes up to me and says " your a bitch because you were born the year of the monkey" I will fist them with a crowbar.
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